SUNNY, FUNNY AND SET (MOSTLY) IN SYDNEY

When a stray mutt is rescued from the Pound he never imagines he’s destined for celebrity! That’s REALITY BARKS, my first Rescue Dog’s Funny Story.

When he was called Barney, Elliott was a scruffy country dog from Bathurst. He’s a bit secretive about how he got lost. Dogs live ‘in the moment’ he will tell you. So the mutt begins his story in Barranyup Pound, somewhere hot and dusty way out west.  His life hangs in the balance. All his hopes and fears about whether he’ll be rescued in time are the focus of that moment. Imagine his relief when he’s rescued by not one, but two couples. Now he’s not only a DINK dog, he’s a Timeshare dog, with four Metro owners, living with all the comforts that the Sydney Harbour-side suburbs lifestyle affords. Even smart beachside cafes that welcome dogs, and snooty dog-grooming salons.

What’s more astounding to Elliott is how he morphs from tatty mutt to being a TV Megastar. Elliott’s pedigree purebred neighbours still look down their canine noses at him. Despite his luxurious surroundings, he’s fed disgusting muck called BIFFO CHUNKY-YUMS because he’s been set-up to do the TV ad for the brand. Yes, it’s all a plot!

What hasn’t changed is his crazy sense of humour. Reality Barks! Elliott tells his story in his own words – his sarcastic take on his four new owners; his nagging fear of being sent back to the Pound; his secret ability to understand everything that’s said to him; to read auras; to learn how to tell lies, and lots, lots more.

A Look Behind The Scenes

I used to take my dogs to Primrose Park, which is the setting for one of the more outlandish, funny scenes in the story. Instigated by Elliott, four dogs team up to turn the tables on their Jog-A-Dog tormentor, the fitness fanatic dog-exerciser Janet Atkins.

One of my favourite scenes is Elliott’s screen test for the TV commercial, when he has to be put up onto a box, or as they’re called a ‘riser’, because his leading lady-dog is taller than he is. Let’s just say that Elliott is not camera-shy!

If you like dog stories with a twist, high jinks comedy, and tales of human greed and manipulation, then you’ll love how Elliott morphs from Mutt to Mega-Star .

Elliott says:

‘For a dog, there are few forbidden pleasures to match luxuriating in the plushy nestle of their owners’ dirty and discarded, but still rather attractively smelly, underwear.

All Books

Reality Barks

Reality Barks

Rescue dog faces the reality of his unusual new life.

It’s a humorous Australian rescue dog’s tell-all tale about how he becomes a celebrity and wins their love.

Wagging The Dog

Wagging The Dog

Rescue dog to the rescue!

Being a celebrity dog is sooo cool, thinks Elliott as Jamie leads him out at the Sydney Stadium with all the other TV animal stars

Three Dogs And A Wedding

Three Dogs and a Wedding

The best day to be Best Dog is Valentine’s Day.

Like all dogs, Elliott understands about love, and he’s already helped rescue Paul and Adriana’s romance, but it seems that Adman Jamie can only see the dollars.

Every Which Way But Home

NEW - OUT NOW!

Prequel to the MUTT TO MEGASTAR SERIES

Curious to know how Elliott (or Barney, as he was in his former life) ended up in Barranyup Dog Pound, way out west in Woop Woop?  For Sydneysiders, Woop Woop is their way of describing anywhere beyond where they are generally prepared to go. For Barney it was also a strange environment, where survival was a matter of life or death. Discover how he learns to deal with it in "Every Which Way But Home". It's the prequel to the Mutt to Megastar series.

Mutt To Megastar Box Set

Mutt To Megastar Boxset

A rescue dog’s funny story.

From Kit James, recognised for his humorous canine dialogue, comes a fun compilation of the first three books in the Mutt to Megastar Series.

Every Which Way But Home

Every Which Way But Home

 

Jolted from his cozy life when he accompanies his Boss, Ian, on an ill-fated trip, Barney is thrown into the unfamiliar world of Barranyup Dog Pound. Getting lost was his own fault – he's got nobody to blame but himself, as he admits. There's nothing worse for a dog than feeling sheepish! 

Now that he's been incarcerated, the smart-arse young mutt must use his wits and his 'smarts' to survive this hostile environment.

Stunned and disappointed that Ian doesn't show to take him home, Barney's got to deal with his new situation. Can he learn to use the system under the guidance of Charlie, an ancient scarred Blue Heeler who takes him under his paw?

Or will it be "Bye, bye Cruel World" with Doc Soper's needle?

And then ... will there be life and love in a new home after the dog pound? Find out how it all happens in Every Which Way But Home, the humorous, yet touching, prequel to the Mutt to Megastar series.

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